Love without borders

They may not look much – an official piece of paper with just enough room for a short message – but, as Pamela Parkes finds out, for thousands of families separated by war, famine, natural disasters and human trafficking, Red Cross letters represent love and hope.

Written in a small, stuffy Red Cross office in Easton, the letters will travel thousands of miles, across continents and war zones – taken by local volunteers, many who may risk their lives, to track down husbands and wives, mothers and fathers, sons and daughters, brothers and sisters, wherever they may be, to deliver the message that their loved ones are alive, living in Bristol and looking for them.

Ruth Baker makes an unlikely international detective, but the work she does at the Red Cross International Family Tracing Service in Bristol helps reunite families from across the world.

The service operates in some 187 countries in the world. Each year around 80 people, many who are refugees from countries like Ethiopia, Eritrea, Iran, Iraq, Somalia or Nigeria, ask the Bristol office help them try and track down lost loved ones.

In the day of social media and mobile phones it seems incredible that people lose contact with their loved ones but, as Ruth explains “a large proportion of our clients have had to flee their homes”.

“Imagine your village is attacked in Somalia all you can do is run, leaving under the cover of night travelling fast…crossing borders. People lose their mobile phone they can be stolen…and then, that is it. That was maybe the only thread of contact that they had with somebody and it’s gone.”

Detective process

“Sometimes people will come directly to us ­ almost immediately they come to Bristol. Often people won’t come for years, they will turn up and have an interview and say they have been thinking about this for 3 or 4 years, but haven’t felt that the time is right, or been too scared, too traumatised or didn’t know exactly what the service could do for them.

“Sometimes it’s really scary ­ the fear that if you use the service you will find out something bad out and people don’t want to go that far.”

The detective process starts with hours of interviews as every detail is slowly revealed. Ruth guides them every step of the way, but inevitably it can sometimes be a traumatic process.

“Making the step to come and talk to us about the service is really empowering for lots of people. At the same time you are sat in a small room with me, a volunteer and maybe an interpreter and we are asking you incredibly difficult questions.

“We are asking people to tell us the last time they saw somebody, that might have been the night they had to flee from their home, that might have been the night they were raped or the night their family were tortured.”

“They don’t have to tell us anything they don’t want to and we tell people this can take as long as you want. Sometimes it can be cathartic. We are not the Home office, we are not you solicitor, we are not asking these questions in a judgemental way ­ for once perhaps it is slightly better.

“Long process”

It can take months or even years before people try and contact their family, and it can also take months and years to track them down.

“There is a basic amount of minimum information that we need,” said Ruth. “But the more information we have the better. People don’t know what information is going to be important or not, but they always have more information than they think they do.”

The team use the information to build up a case file then the information is passed to the international teams.

“Volunteers from communities across the world are trained to find lost family members,” said Ruth. “They obviously have local knowledge and understanding . For us sometimes it baffling and we think how is anyone going to find this but, if someone gave me information about someoneor somewhere in Easton, I would be able to understand them.”

However, sometimes it can be slow process and Ruth has cases on her books which are five years old. “You can only reassure people that the case is still open and we are still looking,” she said.

“Romantic and sweet”

When the volunteers find the person they are looking for they give them the letters to read, or read it to them. Then they encourage them to write a letter back on the reverse of the form.

Those letters make the long journey back to the Easton office where Ruth will pass on the news that the Red Cross has found a mother, father, son, daughter, brother or sister.

“It’s wonderful when we get to pass on the news. I think I mustn’t cry, I mustn’t cry ­ but sometimes showing emotion is sympathy, empathy bonding with the person you are working with ­ it is amazing.”

“There something romantic and sweet about it (writing a letter). It is all about the openness, you can show exactly what is written and it is that what gives the Red Cross the ability to go across borders and cross war zones. They are not passing any information which is at all political or
hidden in any way they just have this letter.”

15% of the cases the Red Cross Family Tracing deal with still relate to World War Two.

Bozenka Pearson approached the Red Cross five years ago to ask for help finding her older half-sister. Before the war her father lived in Poland with his wife and baby daughter. When the Russians invaded in 1939 he was arrested and sent to a Russian prison. He never saw his family again.

“After his release he joined the Polish Second Corps Army in 1942 and eventually settled in England and married my mother,” said Bozenka. “ He made repeated efforts to trace his first wife and daughter but they had disappeared.

“After my parents’ deaths, I requested my father’s army records from the MOD. There I found my half-sister’s name and date of birth and the address she had last lived at with my father’s first wife. I gave all this information to the Red Cross and, apart from regular letters telling me there was no news, nothing happened.

“But then, in January (2014), I received an email saying my niece, Beata, was trying to contact me. Her mother had received the Red Cross message saying I was trying to get in touch.

Bozenka said: “I always wanted to find my half-sister. My father used to talk about her and her mother and just before he died he said to me that one of the things he really, really regretted was that he could never trace his oldest daughter and I just thought I wanted to do it.

“I just wish my father had been alive, I really, really do. The next thing we want to do is meet up face to face, which we hope to do soon.

Saytun Ali, grew up in Somalia with her parents and sisters. She was visiting the local market with her cousin when fighting broke out in town. The violence blocked the way to Saytun’s home and she couldn’t get back.

She travelled to the UK on her own in August 2012 – aged only 17.

“It was so hard without my family,” she says. “I was happy that I finally felt safe, but some days I couldn’t eat I was so worried about them.”

She had no idea where they were or if they had survived the fighting.

In December 2012, she contacted the Red Cross’ International Family Tracing service.

Luckily, she could remember a lot of detail about her hometown, including local landmarks, which she marked on a hand-drawn map.

The team now had enough information to send a Red Cross message and tracing form to Saytun’s father, who was the most well-known member of her family. They also contacted BBC Somalia, in case Saytun’s relatives heard the radio programme.

“I felt hopeful when I heard about the tracing service and what they could do,” recalls Saytun.

“Although they warned that they might also find sad news about my family, I was ready to hear everything. I felt sure I would get some news about them.”

After more than a year, the Red Cross finally received a message from the Somali Red Crescent.

Her family had been found. Her father had sent a message back, saying they were safe and well in Somalia. They also sent a telephone number, so Saytun could contact them.

“It was incredible… Amazing,” she says. “I was so happy! Before I got news, I would sit on my own and think about them all the time, but now I can call them anytime I want to talk.”

But there was more.

Saytun’s father told her that her older sister, who had fled Somalia at the same time, was also living in the UK.

Saytun found her sister’s address and travelled to northern England to be reunited.

She now has regular phone contact with her parents – and hopes they will one day be able to escape the constant conflict of Somalia and join her in the UK.

“I feel so grateful to the Red Cross for all they have done,” says Saytun. “I wish everyone could be as lucky as me.”

 The Red Cross in Bristol is on Felix Road, Easton. Telephone 0117 9415 048 or email rbaker@redcross.org.uk