Interview: Tom Allen

A man who has supported Sarah Millican around the world (comedically speaking), won the prestigious So You Think You’re Funny Award, and has been favourably compared to Eddie Izzard, Victoria Wood and Oscar Wilde, Tom Allen is one of the most erudite acts in British comedy. Never happier than when he’s tossing out quotes from the peripatetic Welsh poet William Henry Davies or lyrics from the movie Grease, Tom is positively purring when he considers his upcoming tour of the land for new show Absolutely, which looks in at Bristol Old Vic on Sunday, May 20.

And early preparations have been proceeding most agreeably. ‘I like to do a preview around the house, maybe for some teddy bears: they’re a gay social grouping that I know. You want it to feel fresh and invent around it and add things and you want to be relaxed about it. Last year I talked a lot about things in my past: this time I wanted to do something about my present – which, admittedly, remains dogged by my past because I’m still living with my parents.’

Of course, Tom is not alone in this situation with many people unable to afford their own home. He aims to capture this feeling of frustration in his new show. ‘As we saw in the general election, my generation and those younger than me are feeling, “well, you’ve got to do something for us; give us one thing to look forward to.”

Tom certainly wouldn’t label himself a political comedian – but he admits we live in an interesting time. ‘For me, though, it’s still combined with a heightened sense of snobbery: I still have an air about me that’s, “well, of course I still want avocado on sourdough bread” and “no, we’re not going to a Toby Carvery for dinner”.’

Living at home with his parents will inevitably lead to some friction. ‘At one point, I started giving my dad some interior design advice about having the desk at a particular angle by the window – and he replied, “why don’t you get your own house?”

‘There’s a little bit of tension around. We decorated my room in a bid to create the illusion of me having control over my life; I took time choosing what colours to have and what lamps to go with and then mum and aunt Christine went to Dunelm Mill and bought me a lamp that they liked. It was very nice but not what I wanted, and you can’t just hide that away in the cupboard. Socially it’s very complicated, and results in lots of lying and eventually an explosive argument: it’s great value.’

Still, there are some changes afoot in Tom’s life and the good news is that he’s passed his driving test at the third attempt. ‘I had a lovely two to three years of learning; it was like another degree and I feel very happy that I can drive.

‘What I want to talk about in the show is that sense of moving forward. I think a lot of people experience those around them running ahead and sometimes if you’re not in the same boat as them (if you’re not getting married or not owning your own home) you can feel a bit left out. For me, I wonder, well, is what they’re doing necessarily better? So, I’ll talk about weddings and some hen parties that I’ve been invited to. I don’t quite know when that started, when gay men began to be invited to hen dos. I don’t think lesbian hen dos invite a straight bloke along so they can sit in front of Sky Sports…’

You’d have assumed that, having passed his driving test, a sense of freedom and joie de vivre would have washed over Tom as he took to the UK’s open roads. Not a bit of it. ‘Because I couldn’t afford my own insurance on a car, I got insured on mum and dad’s Ford Fiesta Zetec – 1.5-litre engine, five doors. The boot doesn’t open, which is not a euphemism.

‘The car is maroon, which is great because it goes with nothing, and so clashes no matter what I wear. There’s moss on the back windows and the wing mirrors are being held on by gaffer tape. To quote from the song Greased Lightning, it’s a real pussy wagon.’

Driving is not without its own anxieties, though. ‘One of the things I get anxious about it is getting petrol on my hands: what if it burns? So, I put the gloves on when I’m at the petrol station, and there are those tissues you can use: I like to avail myself of all the accessories. But when I did so, my friend openly mocked me.’

Motoring issues aside, as someone who clearly has a deep love of language, you can imagine Tom joyfully revelling in the discovery of new words. ‘I do like words. I learned the word ‘esoteric’ just the other day: “that which is created or delivered for a specific audience or an audience with a specific reference point”.

‘I don’t know if I’m esoteric; I think I’d like to think I was, but in reality I’m actually very ordinary. But isn’t that the thing, it’s the game we all play: the secret that we all hide is that we’re actually the same as everybody else. I do say the word ‘absolutely’ quite a lot and last year I called my show Indeed. They’re just words for saying yes, and it is important to say yes to things and to live life to the full as much as one can.’

Tom Allen: Absolutely Bristol Old Vic, May 20. For more info, visit bristololdvic.org.uk/whats-on/tom-allen-absolutely

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