Film / News
Chortle at shoddy Cyborg with the Bristol Bad Film Club
Amazingly, back in the 1980s trash merchants Cannon Films owned the rights to Spider-Man. But the contract stated that these would revert to Marvel if they failed to make a Spidey film by April 1990. At the same time, the notoriously over-promising studio was eager to churn out a sequel to He-Man flick Masters of the Universe. The plan was for both films to be directed by B-movie veteran Albert Pyun, whose cheap’n’cheerful oeuvre (The Sword and the Sorcerers, Alien From L.A., etc) had been compared to that of Ed Wood.
The plug was pulled on both projects, but Cannon had already invested $2 million on development. So Pyun spent a whole weekend hacking out a storyline for a new film, with the intention of recouping some of that loot by recycling the costumes and sets. And so Cyborg was cobbled together. Belgian lunk Jean-Claude Van Damme, who’d made his name with the box office hit martial arts grunt’n’grapple flick Bloodsport (cited by none other than Donald Trump as his favourite movie), was cast in the lead role as Gibson Rickenbacker (so cool he was named after two guitar manufacturers) – whose mission is to save civilisation in a plague-ridden future USA by dodging dastardly flesh pirates to deliver a hot lady cyborg to some boffins in New York City.
The film was panned on release back in 1989. Roger Ebert’s verdict concluded: “Movies like this work if they’re able to maintain a high level of energy and invention, as the Mad Max movies do. They do not work when they lower their guard and let us see the reality, which is that several strangely garbed actors feel vaguely embarrassed while wearing bizarre costumes and reciting unspeakable lines.”
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“Although director Albert Pyun brings out nothing but the worst in the mercifully brief recitations of dialogue, he does know how to stage and pile up effectively brutal action sequences till you feel as though you’ve been through four world wars in under 85 minutes,” acknowledged the LA Times. “It’s desensitizing violence in all its glory: You may cheer during the rousing slugfests, then hate yourself afterward.”
Nonetheless, Cyborg has acquired a cult reputation over the years. Now it’s back on the big screen as Bristol Bad Film Club‘s February selection. Find out whether you hate yourself afterwards when it’s shown at the Bristol Improv Theatre on Thursday 16 February. Tickets, price £5, are available here, with all profits going to Bristol Animal Rescue Centre. Grab ’em quickly – these events are very popular. The (other) BBFC’s January screening of Stone Cold is already sold out.
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