Reclaiming ‘butch’: a new night for dancing freely and letting go

For years, women and non-binary people have battled society’s gender stereotypes, ridiculed for having wearing men’s clothes, having cropped air or appearing like a ‘tomboy’.

But creator Alexa Ledecky is striving to reclaim and celebrate ‘butchness’ and create more positive representations of masculine-presenting women and people.

Her new night Soft Butch is for women, non-binary and trans people – to fill a hole in Bristol’s nightlight which Alexa says, more often than not, does not cater for queer women.

Held at the Jam Jar, DJ and producer Alexa describes it as “a safe and held space for you to come and twerk/shake/shuffle/sway freely in all your messy glory”.

A night celebrating all butchness, for women, non-binary and trans people

“I’ve been to many different queer nights,” she said, describing what drove her to start Soft Butch.

“But the DJ industry is still very male-dominated and a lot of LGBTQIA+ events crowds are mostly made of cis men.

“As I got older and understood my identity better, I started to really crave queer women and butch-centred spaces.

“I also noticed how heavy drinking, substance abuse and a general sense of numbing, which rule most of the nightlife scene, didn’t actually make me feel truly welcome to show up as my real, messy, weird self.”

From attended a DJ-ing basics workshop by EatUp! collective in 2019, she went on to play her first gig at the Sugar Loaf in Easton for New Year’s Eve.

“Soft Butch is the combination of my love for music and DJ-ing, and my will to create a safe space for my community to come and dance freely, let go and feel at home,” Alexa explained.

Although Alexa points to thriving dance spaces in the city like Misscothèque and Booty Bass, she said there needs to be more carved out for queer women. “Although things are starting to change with nights like Soft Butch and Bristol Butch Bar, ‘Where’s our version of Bristol Bear Bar?’ is a sentence I’ve heard so many times!”, she joked.

At Soft Butch, music spans from dancehall and drum and bass to afrobeat and more from Alexa – aka DJ LEXX. The are principles too, like no drinks or phones on the dance floor to encourage revellers to gather in a “fully present, meaningful way”.

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“Butchness has been dragged in the dirt for decades (if not forever),” Alexa said.

“We get caricatured, pushed around and discriminated against for how we present and what we stand for.”

“I feel a lot of gratitude and love for projects that document and challenge this, such as Butch Is Not A Dirty Word, Rebel Dykes and more.

“Butches are amazing. Butches are complex. Butches go through a lot. Butches are sensitive. Butches are both strong and fragile. Butches love to dress, speak and dance in all sorts of ways.”

“Let’s remind the world of all these things.”

The next Soft Butch is being held at The Jam Jar on January 11. Tickets are pay-what-you-can from £7 up, with £1 tickets available for those who are struggling financially.

All photos: Henri T

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