‘It’s time to divorce from our divorce law’

The highest court in England has ruled that a woman must remain married to her husband against her wishes.  Hang on – let me check my calendar – yep, it is 2018.

This farce has come about due to the UK’s antiquated divorce laws. Once a marriage has broken down, a couple must apply to court for a divorce supported by one of the following five grounds:

1.    Adultery

2.    Unreasonable behaviour

3.    Two years separation (where the couple agree to divorce)

4.    Five years separation (where one person wishes to remain married)

5.    Desertion

In other words, couples going through one of the most difficult times of their lives must make their personal hell fit into one of the law’s neatly prescribed categories. So, if you haven’t cheated on your spouse or behaved like a scummy human being, you must wait two years before being able to divorce.

Couples are stuck between a rock and a hard place by effectively having to choose which one of them will take the hit for ‘unreasonable behaviour’ or waiting two years. The most common ground for divorce in the UK is unreasonable behaviour, suggesting most couples choose the former.

Deciding to separate is a difficult enough time as it is without having to attribute blame. Even where couples have the best intentions to deal with divorce amicably, it’s easy to see how having to identify ‘unreasonable behaviour’ in a relationship can very quickly descend into a mud-slinging match.

Alternatively, the option of hitting the pause button on life for two years isn’t practical for most couples. It leaves them in a state of limbo, unable to sort out finances or living arrangements.  Can you imagine living with your ex for two years after breaking up? The psychological trap of feeling unable to move on should also not be underestimated. A Bristol family lawyer has said having to explain our outdated law to distressed couples walking through her door is becoming increasingly embarrassing.

It’s time to divorce from our divorce law – a law which was drafted when homosexuality and abortion were still illegal. A ‘no blame’ system would facilitate more amicable divorces which are better for individuals and families.

In the 21st century, people should have the right to break away from an unhappy marriage without having to justify their decision. Supporters of the current system raise concerns about the introduction of “divorce on demand”, but I’ve never known being trapped in an unhappy marriage being the key to saving it.

Zara Jordan is a trainee solicitor from Bristol who writes about legal and social issues in her spare time.

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