Your say / Transport
Pedal-power buses coming to Bristol for 2015
This column is written by Julian Owen
Plans have been announced to run the First Bristol bus fleet on pedal power. The inaugural CycloBus conversion is slated to roll out on January 1, 2015, when the city becomes European Green Capital. A bid from Bristol City Council secured a £3million development grant from the Department of Transport, with First Group supplying £1.28 and three discarded copies of Metro in match-funding.
First West MD, Bob Croesus, told Bristol24/7: “Bristol is well known as the UK’s first Cycling City, and we want it to become even better known as… well, yeah, the First cycling city. Hmm… when do you go to press?”
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A couple of hours later, a voicemail from Croesus said: “Okay, so: ‘We’re not jumping on the cycling bandwagon, we’re building it’. Go with that instead. Thanks.”
Ninety per cent of seats on a CycloBus are fitted with pedals, each wired to charge the vehicle’s electric motor. Though fares are identical to those on the familiar FossilFeeding service, Croesus refuted claims by local passenger pressure group, Drive Watch, that travellers are being exploited.
“People pay handsomely to sit on bikes in gyms all the time,” he said, “and they don’t even go anywhere. Let’s be clear: if you get on the 76 at Hengrove Park and pedal your way to Cribbs Causeway, you really won’t be able to put a figure on the sense of achievement you’ll feel. What we’re offering the pedalling community is absolutely priceless.”
The remaining 10 per cent of seats will be fitted without pedals, situated behind an electrified fence at the rear of the bus, and available upon payment of a “small discretionary charge”.
Statutory law requires anyone bearing an Older Person’s or Disabled Person’s Bus Pass be allowed free travel, though they will also be issued with a ticket reading ‘POLITE NOTICE. Kindly give up your seat to any person with impressive-looking calves’.
First’s head of marketing played down concerns that off-peak cyclist shortages could lead to massive timetable disruption. “Customers are well used to turning up at a bus stop and hoping for the best. Anyway, that’s the news with me, Julian, when do we go on the record?” said Paige Obull.
In related news, a memo obtained by Bristol24/7 reveals the Bristol Post has been ordered by the Health and Safety Executive to temporarily close its letters page.
“We fear that the distilled bile of readers’ responses to a scheme combining buses and bikes could cause newspapers to spontaneously combust,” said an HSE source. “Now, unless you want to make things even worse, for Christ’s sake don’t tell anyone the order came from us.”
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